Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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