so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
