Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
