Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
