you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
