plz talk dirty to me
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
