It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
