I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
