cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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