Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
send nudes
from the living room?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
