Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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