I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
