i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
