Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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