Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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