he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
