Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
She's the barista slut.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
