It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
