the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
You may now shotgun with the bride
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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