We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Randomize