Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
