Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
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