where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
