I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Randomize
