so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize