I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
