He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
how drunk are you?
Several
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
