i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I just found puke in my bra..
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
If I die, sorry about rent.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
