If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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