careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
