help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
