I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Randomize
