god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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