Dual....:-)
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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