i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Randomize
