I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
