I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I can text with my tongue
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
