I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize