I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Randomize
