idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
