And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
