yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
