It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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