girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I need water and some morals
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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