Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize
