If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
