so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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