so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
