i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Randomize
