It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Randomize